Learning a new skill can be exciting and rewarding. It can remind you of all the resources you already possess and your capacity to acquire more and more understanding. Often, when we learn new skills, we foster new relationships with others and acquire fresh perspectives on ourselves and the world.
Yet it isn't always plain sailing. A new skill is rarely acquired without a few setbacks and missteps along the way. Sometimes a new skill can seem daunting, even impenetrable. Sometimes it seems as if we get to a point in our new learning that we feel we cannot get past. Maybe we see others succeeding and feel that perhaps we lack some vital ingredient or some innate ability that means we'll never get there.
This is, of course, an illusion.
The truth is that we've been here before. We've had setbacks before. From the time we first opened our eyes in the world, actually. And the evidence for this is right in front of you.
Shoelaces.
Think about what's involved in tying your shoelaces. What now feels like a simple, effortless skill was something that once had you truly stumped. Maybe you remember being taught to tie your laces, maybe you can't, but most of us probably had a similar experience.
At first, we didn't need to tie our laces at all. We were so small that we'd just be sitting there, gazing at our feet, cozily wrapped up in socks. And, suddenly, one of those friendly giants would appear and slot our socked feet into those foot-shaped containers with the strings attached. And with a whirl of hands, our laces were tied, our feet ready for action.
Sometime later, we'd be invited to master the mysteries of the laces for ourselves. We watch as the skill is slowed down, explained, and repeated. And then we try for ourselves.
And at first it's probably a disaster. Our fingers fumble, and we probably feel frustrated. It seems as if we'll never master this superfast sorcery that we see occurring just below our knees.
So do we give up? Do you still seek out your parents' aid each morning? No. Of course not. You were patient. You persisted. You practiced and practiced until you could tie you laces with ease.
You succeeded.
It's tempting to think that the skills that you are attempting in your life these days are somehow different to tying your laces. But they're really not.
Think about how you really succeeded in learning to tie your laces. It wasn't all at once, was it? Maybe at first you simply practiced how to pick up a lace in each hand and orient your fingers into the right position. After that, maybe you just focused on making loops of the laces, and then passing one loop around the other.
You see the pattern that's emerging. Any new skill can be broken into parts. And, if necessary, those parts can be broken into smaller parts. And each part draws on particular generic abilities that we all share. Memory. Motor skills. Feedback.
The reason you succeeded at learning to tie your laces is the same reason that you can learn any new skill. You broke the skill down into parts that you can master one by one.
When you look at somebody effortlessly performing a skill that is new to you, sometimes your mind plays a clever trick on you to diminish your confidence. And the reason this trick is so clever is that there's a grain of truth in it.
You hear a little voice in your head whispering something like, 'I'll never be able to learn that!'
And there is a grain of truth in this. You may not be able to learn that skill in one step. Because nobody can.
When you hear a virtuoso on the piano, you are hearing a skill that began with clumsily learning scales. When you see a basketball player dart past three opponents and sink a basket, you are looking at someone who began learning when they hadn't the strength to throw the ball high enough to even reach the basket.
So if you ever become daunted when you explore a new skill, look down and remember that the secret to success is always right at your feet.
Ways You Can Flourish
1. Relax & Recognize You've Been Here Before
If you feel you're struggling with a new skill, the very first thing to do is simply relax. Take a few moments to mentally release what you're trying to do. Recall that this is not the first time you've learnt a new skill. Think of a time that you felt this way in the past. And then reassure yourself that any fleeting frustration will soon pass once you recognize the progress that you're making.
If you want to take this further, you can even guide yourself through a visualization of yourself learning to tie your laces, acquiring each skill step, one after the other.
2. Explore The Parts Of The Skill Rather Than The Whole
Take a few moments to step back and look at the constituent parts of the skill you are learning.
What is the first thing that is learned in this skill?
Have you already learned this?
What is the next part?
And so on. You can even list these so that it is easier to track your progress and become inspired as you cross them off, one by one.
You can also break the skill down into its generic aspects. So, for each part, what do you need to know (memory)? And what do you need to do (motor skills)?
3. Model A Mentor While Making The Skill Your Own
One of the simplest ways to recognize that the skill you're exploring is one that can be acquired over time is to identify a mentor. If someone already possesses the skill you desire - and, more importantly, has passed through the same learning steps you are - you can draw from their expertise and experience.
They are a real world example of the universal truth that you can acquire almost any new skill with the right mindset.
While a mentor can offer you invaluable advice and support, it's important to make sure that you are making this new skill - and the learning experience - your own. Although every skill requires some basic learnings, we each have our own unique approach to understanding.
You will find your new skill all the more rewarding if you can make the learning experience that precedes it unique to you.
Happy flourishing. Dan. Providing useful self development, self empowerment and self esteem tips and reviews online.
No comments:
Post a Comment